Breath of Fresh Air

A Breath oh Fresh Air

I’m A Little Teapot

on April 21, 2017

What do you do when you find out you aren’t perfect?

Yes, I need to explain that, being that I am a “champion in practice” of progress and not perfection. This is about the fact that we are all flawed; and while we know it at the best of times, at our worst of times we tend to tell tales about our troubling behavior instead of our truths.

Like this morning.

So my husband walks into the kitchen after his run and before mine and told me about some plans that had changed. Again, this is pre-workout, when I am far from my best self. Some people you can’t talk to before coffee; for me, it is before working out.

So when he spoke; I didn’t respond, I REACTED. My button had been pushed so I couldn’t (didn’t) stop from sounding off. As I walked away to create some space to simmer down, I reminded him this wasn’t the best time to talk to me, to which he said “It’s never a good time to talk to you.”

OoOoOuch. This took BALLS to say. (Husbands reading this are perhaps silently celebrating, while all the wives are shouting back. [And everyone is wondering if Matt survived to tell his side of the story here, spoiler alert – he did!]).

I left to go on my run. Without any more words. And when the run wasn’t enough, I jumped on my bike. And then I realized what I knew the second he said it but I didn’t want it to be true:  He. Was. Right.

I am aware of this; it isn’t new news that my first reactions are hardly my best responses. But I have been working on it. And writing about it. But back to that progress not perfection thing… unfortunately, this was neither of those things. It was just a tantrum in its finest terrible.

When I went back home, we both apologized. But this was on me, and I told him he was right (rare win for Matt!). We hugged. We forgave. We went on with our days. But as the morning grew gone, I still felt stumped by my own snap. And then my friend Toni’s “Friday Rambling” post on Facebook reminded me that instead of looking at what I lacked, I should be enjoying my room for improvement. She talked about her own blame game and reactions, and offered an inspiring illustration that put her back on her own path of progress:

“If you have a tea cup that has very sweet tea in it- when it is bumped, jostled or otherwise banged around- sweet tea spills out of it. The bumping of it doesn’t change the contents. If there is sweet tea inside, that’s what spills over.”

teapot1

Me doing my best teapot (Disney, 11/15)

 

I was bumped and I spilled; but I don’t have to think of this as a fail – the story serves me and everyone else better if I enjoy this lesson (re)learned as recognizing my room for improvement.

 

A girl’s gotta have goals (to be better than her day before) to even see her path to progress, with or without the perspective of (im)perfection. And this means that sometimes we may be assholes to make room for our amazing.

Advertisements

One response to “I’m A Little Teapot

  1. TLH says:

    Beautiful…

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: